Wedding Countdown: T – 10 days

As the day draws closer, I cannot help but miss my sister Grace. She passed away suddenly a little over two years ago. She was the only one in my family I felt that I can truly relate to. The only other one who was a believer and interceding for our family with me.

Weddings, relationships, heartbreaks are what you talk over with your siblings, especially if you like them and we liked each other a lot. Despite how often our personality clashed, (me the extrovert and first born, or technically only child while she was an introvert) we bonded in how weird we both were. So as the wedding day draws near, it’s really difficult that she’s not here to relish in the fact that this day has finally come! To rejoice together that those gut wrenching nights of unanswered questions, tears and heartbreak do lead to some place better when we entrust our love life to the Lord. 

The Lord’s been gracious and given me dreams of Grace to comfort my heart since she passed away, I’ve even heard her speak to me in times of worship. Once she came to me in a dream and gave me a hug after I prayed the night before for the Lord to give me grace to love Him. In the dream, she handed me something that was already hers. I woke up feeling so much love and joy, touched that the Lord gave me a dream, sending my sister to give me grace to love Him. 

Well, Grace, I know you’re in the throne room, worshipping and praying with Jesus in all His glory, but I just wanted you thank you for praying for me up there. I need it. No, I really need it. Really. And you probably see everything, or maybe you’re just staring at Jesus cause He’s so gloriously good looking. But just wanted to let you know that Dustin’s a great guy. You’ll meet him one day and we’ll hang. He was worth the wait. He truly loves the Lord, leads me to His heart, loves God more than his ministry, he’s considerate, gentle, kind, sensitive, good looking, sincere, generous, has a great voice when he sings, creative like me, got a strange sense of humor but makes me laugh, taller than me, much much taller than me and part Native American (which I thought was so cool!). I know you had something to do with it along with the Lord in making this happen in spite of myself : ) and you know what I mean hahahaha….better than anybody else. So pray and release some extra angels to the wedding, you can appear too if you’d like. Though I think that may freak people out a little. But, maybe they need to be shocked into the reality of Christ? I dunno. You talk it over with the Big Man and work something out. I know you already know, but I didn’t have a maid of honor in honor of you. I said honor twice, if you were here, you would correct me : ) haha Ms. Grammer. Miss you and love you Grace! See you most likely when you appear in the clouds with Jesus at His second coming. 

P.S. I miss watching season one of Alias with you til 5am in the morning when I’m sick with bronchitis 

Wedding Countdown: T – 15 days

discussed wedding video with my friend Jason who will be documenting the event. while trying to decide what feel and style I wanted, I came across the cana family. I love their work. They do such a beautiful job at capturing how an individual expresses their love for their soon to be spouse on their wedding day. I love the old film feel they incorporate into their work as well. Check them out. 

Wedding Countdown: T minus 17 days

Some brides struggle with being over controlling Bridezillas, I on the other hand struggle with trying to please everyone. Though not many have special requests or questions for our wedding, there’s enough that makes me a go all little coocoo at times. Today was one of those days. But then at I prayed and asked the Lord to speak to me throughout the day, He reminded me why I’m doing all this, to marry the man of my dreams that I’ve waited for for so long. 

It’s the same with our Christian walk. When we loose sight of why we’re enduring all the trials and the endless mundane tasks, we loose motivation and begin to want to gratify our immediate desires rather than wait for the one that will truly satisfy us. When we loose sight of the beauty and love of the Bridegroom we as a church are preparing ourselves for, life seems dull and drives us up the walls. So Lord, renew our vision give us greater revelation of Your Son. 

Wedding Countdown: T minus 19 days

Dustin’s landlord/good friend/groomsmen JD help us cut up some logs for centerpieces yesterday

also got a goo start on the boutonnieres…anyone else have trouble spelling that word besides me? Put in the feathers for Dustin’s heritage 🙂

started on props for our photobooth

Met with Paige, my coordinator friend who will be coordinating the wedding. Tomorrow I’m dropping off my decorations at Taryn’s and going over centerpieces with them. Meeting with Adam Hanly to discuss wedding photos and hopefully Jason White too to go over the wedding video. Then Johnny, our MC…my mom’s also flying in from Taiwan this week. Lots going on….but feel God’s grace! Thank You Jesus. 

Wedding Countdown: 20 days

Three exciting things that all has something to do with the wedding:

1. my dad’s going to ship his paintings over to America to be used as decoration at the wedding. Couple years ago, my dad went through a phase of painting huge blow up versions of flowers. These paintings are nearly my size if not bigger. I’ve wanted him to send one to me forever! And now he is! YEAH! What’s even more significant is that they’re three different paintings of roses and lilies, which helps visually enhance the theme of the wedding: we are God’s roses and lilies. We are beautiful in His eyes. We are made new, no longer the old man, but the new! Here’s a sneak peak…(I think this is one of the ones he’s sending)

2. God’s bringing more truth into my heart, giving me greater discernment and deeper understanding of my worth. The Lord used one of my friends to help me realize that something that happened to me was wrong and made me say it out loud. Something about declaring it out loud helped my heart begin to align with the truth rather than remain in the lie. The gentleness of the Lord came to me last night and began to help me hear Him. I haven’t really been able to hear the Lord on this situation because I was afraid that He would respond in anger. But instead, He responded with love and the truth. What a mighty God we serve and what a wonderful Father He is. 

3. I think I know how I want my makeup to be on my wedding day! Here’s Tanya Burr’s tutorial on the latest look for fall runway look. Red lips and very simple eyes. I tried on Russian Red at MAC today and loved it on me!

Wedding Countdown: 24 more days

Last night at our premarital counseling with Bob and Becky Falkner, the Lord used Becky to speak powerfully to me. She said that she saw that I still see myself as a little girl and the Lord wanting to lead me into seeing myself as a woman. She shared that even though I’m much younger than her, I am now her peer.

Culturally in the Asian world, we are expected to respect our elders and leaders. Though it is good that this is so stressed in the Asian culture, where we often fall short is the definition of what respect and honor entails. In God’s kingdom and perspective it doesn’t mean that we agree with everything older people say to us or about us. The difference between a girl and a woman of God is that we seek the Lord and put His words above all others. Of course this doesn’t mean that we can just live in our own little bubble of only receiving what we want to hear, but it does mean that we place the words of man in its rightful place, below the words of God.

God will speak to us through people, but I observe especially in my own personal life and in the lives of other Asians that as Asian women, or just Asians in general, we absorb and receive others’ words as infallible truth when only the words of God are to be revered in this way. So Lord, I just speak and pray this over my Asian sisters, God help all of us have a revelation of what it means to be a woman and give us grace to value Your words above the words of man. Let the words of man fall to the ground and only Your words remain. Amen.