When you want to start introducing Chinese at home and start bilingual parenting, it may seem overwhelming at first. At least it was for me. I didn’t really know where or how to start.

This post is more geared towards preparing yourself mentally and emotionally as a parent for the marathon of bilingual parenting, I’ll post more about the practicals later.

It’s not an easy task but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible. Having the right expectations and making choices that will help you and your family be successful in this journey is key.

After doing this for the past two years with my daughter and working as a Mandarin-Chinese tutor the past year, I wanted to empower you to do the same. So here are my five simple ways you can set yourself up for success!

1. Do What Works for Your Family

The way another family is raising their children bilingual probably won’t completely work for you. Take time to think through how your family functions and what is doable for everyone. Be flexible. Try different methods out and if it doesn’t work, try another approach. Endeavor to not to let learning Chinese become more important than family dynamics.

One Parent One Language (OPOL) may work for some but not for others and it’s ok. Each family is beautifully unique and how you and your kids learn Chinese will look different as well. Instead of fighting against the makeup of your family, embrace the specific abilities, means and time your family has and use it to your advantage.

Some families will choose to do specific tasks in Mandarin and others in English simply it’s easier to communicate that matter in one’s native tongue and that’s ok. Others may speak a certain language on specific days of the week. Remember, you know your family and kids the best. Don’t let stats and methodologies conducted in labs completely dictate what goes on in your home.

2. Take it A Step At a Time

What are you able to do right now? Speak Mandarin during meal time? Start playing Chinese kids songs instead of English ones at home and in the car? Switch up story time to Chinese?

Start simply by doing one to two things that you can handle at first. Once you’ve got that down, move onto the next thing you want to incorporate. You don’t need to switch everything into another language in one day (unless that’s doable for you and your kids don’t flip out). Remember Rome wasn’t built in a day.

Remember Rome wasn’t built in a day.

Bilingual parenting is a marathon not a sprint. You want to set both you and your kids up for long-term success rather than stress everyone including yourself out. And how you do that is setting attainable goals and having realistic expectations of not only your kids but of yourself as well. Remember to be kind to yourself!

3. Build a Bilingual Parenting Support System

Become friends with like-minded parents in real life (if available) and online. You need a support system and a community to vent to, ask questions and learn from.

Bilingual parenting is still a rarity and that fact can make one feel lonely and helpless which can lead you to quitting or increased frustration with your kids 🙋🏻. We all need the support of other families and parents who are doing the same thing to help us keep going when all we want to do is quit.

I’m so thankful that we were able to move somewhere where there are parents with common interests and be friends with like-minded parents online like Betty of Chalk Academy.

Here are some great FaceBook groups for bilingual parenting I’m a part of that I would encourage you to join if you haven’t yet:

• Raising Bilingual Children in Chinese & English
• Christian Parents Raising Bilingual Children in English & Chinese
• Montessori-Inspired Kids Learning Chinese

4. Communicate with Friends & Family

Clearly communicate with friends and family your decision and reasons why you’ve decided to raise your kids bilingual. This will help lessen some of the unnecessary stress and misunderstanding.

Speaking a different language in the presence of others can be isolating to those who don’t speak the same language, some may even perceive it to be rude. Speaking a common language is the main way people build relationships with one another. And when friends and family aren’t able to do that with your child, it can cause friction in the relationship.

Therefore I believe it is crucial to make the effort to let your friends, family members and caregivers know your decision. If you’re planning on focusing on the minority language first before introducing the dominant language, let others know. If you plan on speaking the minority language in public, at play dates etc, let your friends know why you’re doing that especially if bilingualism is unfamiliar to them.

I would make the effort to tell the friends we hang out with our decision to raise our daughter bilingual because I speak to her in Mandarin in public. Most were understanding and even encouraging when I told them. But there were also times when people’s comments made me wonder whether I made the right decision or if I have the wrong priorities.

I didn’t do this perfectly, there definitely were times I wish I had done a better job. Sadly, even if you communicate everything to the best of your abilities, it doesn’t mean there won’t be hurt feelings and misunderstanding. When grandparents, aunts and uncles can’t communicate clearly with their loved ones, it is understandable why they get frustrated. But I believe by simply making the effort to do so, it will show others you treasure their relationship.

5. Take Time to Celebrate Success in Your Bilingual Parenting

I try to set goals for each month and also have tangible things around the house tracking our progress in Mandarin. Not only does this help your child be proud of their progress, it helps you see how far you’ve come. Click here to get my free bilingual parenting goal planner.

Setting goals help me do this as well. By writing down our goals at the beginning of the month, and taking just ten to fifteen minutes at the end of the month to evaluate our progress, it boosts my confidence and motivates me to keep going.

When you see progress, remember to take time to celebrate! You worked hard and that’s worth celebrating!